A Goblin's Life
|A Goblin's Life|
|Author(s)||Burnout and BBBen|
|Authoring system||ADRIFT 3.9|
|Cruelty scale||Cruelty to be determined|
How It Begins
How could you have been so stupid?
You knew ol' Nbox never liked you- Since you were just a little kobold, he'd always talked about 'leaving the lil' gut tugger for the fire ants'- But you still couldn't stay away, could you?
Not in front of the entire Muckshade Tribe, you couldn't. Not when the ancient goblin smiled that nasty, yellowed-fang smile at you, and said: "Gronk decrees! This 'ere rotter is chosen for da Long Walk!"
At first, you thought you'd been in the fungus beer again. It definitely seemed like a nightmare, really- You were still a year too young to go on your gobllinhood quest. But still, Gronk had spoken...
It didn't seem so bad at first. After all, you always wanted to be a hunter...How bad could it be? But then, Nbox said, "Hey, you! You know 'oomans?"
Who doesn't know 'oomans, they and their big, big swords? They always come through the swamp, hacking, slashing, laying waste to the ol' huts- Damned annoying of them. Of course, alla them can't quite kill you all...Right? Right?
"Ya have to bash one- Bash one right up, yer'hear? Or..." And you could've sworn the old bastard was grinning then, "Bring a 'ooman female back. One of those elfie gits would be great, too. Well, Gronk be with you! Go get'im, boys!"
And with that, they chased you out of da swamp. At least they let you take some stuff first...But ol' Nbox, he was a wise one. He put this shiny thing on your neck- Da Eye Of Gronk, he called it. "So's we can see whence yooze coming back," he said. So, you can't bluff them.
-That was three days ago. Three dry, miserable days ago. You're out of the swamp now, proceeding with a heavy heart to the nearest 'ooman settlement...
...Wait, what was there? You can hear footsteps, the sound of fire to the north! 'oomans...
-Maybe if you're real cunnin'-like, ol' Nbox will let you go home...}
- A Goblin's Life (Burnout and BBBen; 14-May-2007; ADRIFT 3.9).
- IFID wanted. (Please replace this line with a babel template.)
- 2007 AIF Mini-comp: 2nd place of 12 entries.
A Goblin's Life ranked 2nd in Writing, Technical, Sex, and Enjoyment; 3rd in Concept; and 5th in Characters.
- Erins 2007: Winner of Best PC (Goblin) and Best Humor.
Placed 2nd for Best Writing.